Monday, April 03, 2006

A Quest For The Vibe Winner


Last Thursday I created a contest on the funniest story in diverting your children's attention just to get a little nookie and boy did I get great entries! I had promised a vibe courtesy of IntimatePursuits.com for the deserving winner but I need help since they are all pretty good. The contest is now closed, but if you would like to share yours if you haven't already - feel free to do so. I will announce the winner on Wednesday morning instead of the promised Tuesday afternoon - so please help me by voting in my comments section on who has the funniest and why?

Here are the 6 contenders:

boodafli said...
i have the unique situation, of living with my baby, my babydaddy, and my mom right now. and for a while after peanut was born, it was looking like she'd be an only child, because obviously, i was never going to have time for sex again. fast forward 5 months, when she magically started sleeping through the night. now, let it be known that we cosleep. and up to this point, me and the babydaddy had only been snuggling. no hankypanky. but 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep, 3 nights in a row, well, that does things to a girl, y'know? so come bedtime, we settle the peanut, and start trying to start a lil sumthing. so we're kissing, and so forth, and it occurs to me, that i'm just not okay with doing it in the bed, so i pull him rather ungracefully to the floor. this of course, is a noisy prospect, and so we freeze, like high school kids about to get caught by daddy, to see if we've awakened the peanut. a minute passes, and nothing. whew! so we get back to business. at this point, i should mention that i'm breastfeeding. but i'm no longer leaking, right? so it never occurs to me to even worry about being shirtless. they don't tell you, in any of the breastfeeding books, that squirting your unsuspecting lover in the face is a possibility during the big O. but nevertheless, that is indeed what happened. bless his heart, he kept right on, and didn't miss a beat, as he wiped his brow, but pretty much, that was the most peculiar booty moment ever. and it's all due to the peanut. who, is still and only child.

Nertnie said...
Hrmm.. k... my humourous story: When the little guy (who is now a strapping 16-yr-old who towers over me) was about 2 or 3, he wandered into the bedroom one night - all bleary-eyed and tousled hair. "Whatcha doin', Mommy?""Erm.. We're wrestling." "Why aren't you wearing clothes?" "We got hot." "Why are you on top, Mommy?" "I'm winning!" He left the room...his father and I giggled a bit.. until he came back a few minutes later... wide-eyed.. and said, "I know what you're doin' Mommy! You're SEXING!"Laughing that hard not only kinda spoils the mood - but it makes things pop out rather suddenly. :D

mommy on the verge said...
Now, if I could MAKE-UP a story, it would be so much better, but this isn't my creative writing class, so here is my okay 'don't wake up the baby story'After putting our baby down (way back when) I didn't want us to wake her, because she was one of those very difficult babies to put to sleep. So, we um...started to do...*things* and things started to get loud, so I kept stopping. Husband was not happy about this, so rather than giving up I said, okay, let's go to the living room. Now, we lived in a very small condo at the time, so our dog's kennel was in our tiny living room as well as where I cats slept. So, I laid a big blanket down on the carpet and I said 'okay, let's start up again.'Husband says 'I can't do it with the dog staring at us.' 'Well, I said, 'if we put her in our room and shut the door, she will start whining.'Husband did not want to go without at this point, so he looked at me, he looked at our dog who was now wagging her tail thinking we were here to play, and then he took the tablecloth off the table and put it over her kennel and locked her in.So, we 'hurried' and did the *eh hem, nasty* and when we were done and laying there, we felt we were being stared at...yes, our Siamese Himalayan cats had woken up from the couch and were now perched near the blanket, blinking at us with their huge blue eyes, thinking with their cat attitudes probably thinking 'YOU WOKE US UP FOR THAT?Okay, that's my story! Great idea for a contest!

Valerie said...
Terrell is only 3 but we have put him in the living room with a elmo video on and the baby gate locked and snuck into his room. He had a futon in his room at the time, it sucked though because he stood at the gate calling to daddy and crying. Now we wait until he is asleep or we let him play on the computer for a quickie.

Mama Kelly said...
actually my best story related to interrupted sex is not related to my having children ....however, the following exchange, or similar, has occured more than once. We settle the girls in front of a movie and say that we need to go talk about something and we'll be back in a few minutes things start to get moving andKNOCK KNOCK mom dad what are you doing in there?nothing ... umm ... we're just talking .... we'll be out in a minute(get back to business for about 30 seconds)mom dad are you done yet?ummm honey ... were ummmm talking about something, we'll finish faster if you don't interrupt
but why is the door locked?because we're talking about ummm grownup things and we need privacyoh okay(resume for 30 seconds)mom dadYEScan we have a snackyes sure have whatever you want just stop knocking on the door

WriteWingNut said...
Okay, here's my story:My husband and I went out to celebrate our anniversary. We never have any privacy at home, especially since our son at that time always wanted to sleep in our room.We went out to dinner and then miniature golf and by the end of the night, we were both thinking that it sucked we would go home and most likely be interrupted when the "real" celebration took place.Sooo...we get the idea of getting a hotel room.We go to the hotel, check in, go up to the room, do the deal, and come down about an hour later to check out.I was so nervous, because it was the same lady at the desk as when we checked in.I stood off to the side, looking at brochures and stuff as my husband boldly went up to pay."Um..was there anything wrong with the room?" the lady asked."No," my husband said calmly, no other explanation given.She looks over at me, looks at him, turns red, and says, "Oh." Then procedes to check us out.I swear she thought I was a hoooker or something!! But it was well-worth it, lol!

7 comments:

Dana said...

Those are some stories! I have to say, I liked WrightWingNut's best though.

Cityslicker Mom said...

interesting question! I just had a need for some diversion lately! :) Hey, thanks for stopping by my blog, visit anytime!!

Crissy said...

Oooh, tough choices! I'm voting for WriteWingNut's, too, though. Hilarious!

Jay said...

What a cool idea for a contest! Man, all of those stories were great. Sorry,ladies...I hope you can all laugh about it by now! I have to vote for the first one, though, because frankly...when I can be both entertained and informed, bonus!

chelle said...

Great contest idea!!! hehe those stories were all so funny!! Love your blog, so glad you stopped by!!

Great Day said...

I would have to vote for Nertnie. You got to love the wrestling exuse. It's what my mom told me when I was a kid!!

Great Day said...

Gotta go with Nertnie. Love the "wrestling" exuse. It's what my mom told me as a kid.